Being a father is by far the best job I have ever had. Honestly, it should not be considered a job because it feels effortless a lot of the time. Don’t get me wrong, there is a lot of work that goes into taking care of my daughter but the joy she brings me every day makes it so easy and worth it!
Growing up, I did not have a father in my life and did not have many male figures in my life to look up to. What I did have was a caring grandmother, a loving mother, and two older sisters that really wanted the best for me and showed me what it was to be a good person. I try not to focus on being a good man and just focus on being a good person. If you are a good person, I think you will be a good man or woman, simple and plain.
When I first found out I was going to be a father, of course, I was nervous. There were so many things going through my head, like will I be good enough, will I be able to provide for and protect her, and mostly how I did not want to end up being a “deadbeat father”. Another concern was how I did not want the relationship with my child’s mother (my wife now) to deteriorate and turn into a bad situation. Right then, I made a conscious decision that I was going to be there for the mother (Lakesha) of my child regardless of the status of our relationship.
The day Lakesha gave birth to my daughter Amari, was one of the most profound moments in my life. When I first laid eyes on her, it seemed like something inside of me had changed. All the fears and doubts about being a great father went away. Knowing that I did not have a father growing up made me want to be the best version of a father that I could be. I knew that I would do anything for this blessing I just received and there was just no way I was going to fail her as a father.
My daughter is now 13 years old today and it has been an amazing journey being her father thus far. I have dealt with plenty of parenting issues ranging from disciplining behavioral problems at school to having the uncomfortable “birds and the bees conversation” but what I learned is that it really does take a village to raise children. One of the problems with that is, if the village does not know, the village can’t help. Luckily I have been blessed to have family and friends who were able to help me along the way. Most importantly, I’ve had a solid life partner who has been there with me every step of the way.